But what makes me such a great jolt, is the fact that the separation can really decide happiness in a person, a moment, then felt able to make me into a miserable half-dead, like my heart is not in place, and my body felt empty, lost contents.
You know, it feels like the wind suddenly changed dry, arid. I'm not going to complain, but it seems too minute you're here.
And the worst thing ever when you miss you someone to a point where you can't breathe and you can feel your heart beating through your chest and your eyes are never focused because your mind is wondering about what he's doing right now and if he already ate and if he's having fun and if he's smiling and being happy and if he's misses you too and it's so hard to forget about him because it's night time here and you're left alone with your thoughts.
And have you ever been in one of those moods where you just want to grab everything and rip it from the walls and break everything because you feel broken and you want to scream and kick and cry too much because nothing feels alright and it's all wrong and wrong, and you don't feel right and I don't know anymore. But it's the morning there and you wish, you could see him next to you smiling in bed as the sun rises to waken you both but you can't cause distance is seperating you from him and crap I miss him sooo much omg:(
And if you cry to much, at any time until your tears not mean nothing in the eyes of him. You just be quiet. Shut up until you know you have to do, you should forget all about him, and open your heart to a better man. But I think everything is difficult.
Do you know, I've been waiting too long, and then he came back to me, and back left me again. It's like a huge hole in my chest. But, my pain indicates that love was real.
You were gone, and now you were gone again.
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